We’re back! Well, I’m back. All of last week I was under the weather PLUS my computer pretty much stopped working. It was hell. Hm? Oh you don’t care; you just want some laughs. Fair enough. Well let’s start things off with a joke, shall we?

Tom was so excited about his promotion to Vice President of the company he worked for and kept bragging about it to his wife for weeks on end.

Finally she couldn’t take it any longer, and told him, “Listen, it means nothing, they even have a vice president of peas at the grocery store!”.

“Really?” he said. Not sure if this was true or not, Tom decided to call the grocery store.

A clerk answers and Tom says “Can I please talk to the Vice President of peas?”

The clerk replies “Canned or frozen?”

Good times. I don’t think that was a problem when I worked at Target.

Here’s some very interesting news. Well…I’m not sure how to say it so I’m going to pull a quote. The site link is here.

Chubby Checker, the musician best known for his 1960 hit recording of “The Twist,” is suing HP over a novelty app for Palm OS of the same name that claims to check the size of your “chubby.” The sum sought is a mind-boggling half a billion dollars. “Chubby Checker” was a $0.99 app originally made for Palm OS (which was abandoned in 2009 in favor of Palm’s WebOS). It allowed users to input the size of a male subject’s feet and receive, in return, an estimation of the size of that guy’s genitalia. For entertainment purposes only, of course.

Sweet Jesus. But wait! It gets better!

Though the $500 million requested in the suit includes compensation for damage to reputation and other measures, the app itself was a dud. According to records at unofficial Palm app archival site House of Palm, it was downloaded only 84 times, potentially netting the parent company a grand total of around $25.

So…yeah. I mean I guess the man is broke. Or, he wants to be in the spotlight again. The darn thing didn’t even workout. If it were accurate, well… *glances at feet*…I’m in trouble.

I got a video for you. When we look at the evening news, we tend to hear bad news. But, there’s always that chance of bloopers that bring in a good laugh. So, here ya go!

Good times! Ah well here’s an awesome image to wrap things up:

C’mon bro…what are you doing?