Author: Dalanel

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Daily Good Stuff 113: Independence Day

July 4th. USA! USA! USA! You already know what today is so I’m not going to dive into this long story or whatever. I will say that I’m going to attempt to make this a themed post.

Mrs Whyte, his teacher advises the class that each school day starts with the “Pledge of Allegiance”*** and instructs them to put their right hand over their heart and repeat after her. As Mrs Whyte starts the recitation she looks around the room, ‘I pledge allegiance to the flag……..’, when her eyes are drawn to Andy who has his hand over the right cheek of his bottom.

‘Andy, I cannot continue till you put your hand over your heart,’ she demands. Andy looks up and replies, ‘It is over my heart.’ After several more attempts to get Andy to put his hand over his heart, Mrs Whyte inquires, ‘Why do you think that is your heart, Andy?’

‘Well Miss,’ answers Andy, ‘because every time my Grandma comes to visit she pats me there and says, “Bless your little heart,” and my Grandma never lies.’

Welp! And now for a video of fireworks…fails…

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Daily Good Stuff 112

Hump day! Alright let’s do it:

A man walked in to a bar after a long day at work. As he began to drink his beer, he heard a voice say seductively “You’ve got great hair!” The man looked around but couldn’t see where the voice was coming from, so he went back to his beer. A minute later, he heard the same soft voice say “You’re a handsome man!” The man looked around, but still couldn’t see where the voice was coming from. When he went back to his beer, the voice said again “What a stud you are!” The man was so baffled by this that he asked the bartender what was going on. The bartender said “Oh, it’s the nuts–they’re complimentary.”

Classic. And I love this commercial:

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Daily Good Stuff 111

Reaching day 111 got me thinking: What happens when I reach day 666? That won’t be for a couple of years though so I guess I got time to think about it. I can’t just skip it. Anyway, it’s another day in July and I’m excited, I guess. Let’s go ahead and start things off with a joke:

An angry wife was complaining about her husband spending all his free time in a bar, so one night he took her along with him. “What’ll you have?” he asked. “Oh, I don’t know. The same as you I suppose,” she replied. So, the husband ordered a couple of Jack Daniel’s and threw his down in one shot. His wife watched him, then took a sip from her glass and immediately spat it out. “Yuck, that’s TERRIBLE!” she spluttered. “I don’t know how you can drink this stuff!” “Well, there you go,” cried the husband. “And you think I’m out enjoying myself every night!”

That one made me laugh out loud. Not many jokes I find do that. Now for comic:

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DALANEL Keeps Growing

Ever since January, DALANEL monthly viewing has been going up, up, and away! May 2013 led us to the best month in blog history and you followed that up with June being even better than that! The streak of getting at least one new follower each week since I started the Daily Good Stuff in March continues as well.

I’m hoping for continued growth but I am aware that eventually the growth will stop. I just hope it’s not any time soon. All of the time and effort put into this thing seems to really be paying off so I’m glad about that. And again, all I’m doing or at least trying to do is bring a positive spin on the world.

I’ve mentioned how I’m trying to build a community where we can talk and stuff but people are coming. No, nobody is commenting but people are coming. People are subscribing. And most of the stuff I post don’t require a comment anyway so it’s not of great concern.

DGS has been the leader but I think the play and video series has brought people in too. I’m just wondering if the viewing will fall off once the play and video series is done in August/September. And I probably won’t run another series since I’ll be slowed with school and work. In the near future, I plan on making an announcement that, if it’s responded to well enough, could really alter the blog’s performance. Of course, it’ll be in a good way.

If I had to rate the blog on a scale of 1-10, I’d give it a three. I mean, it’s growing and all but it’s not a household name or anything like that. I’m still in the “oh I stumbled upon this blog and saw this pic”. I strive to be known as DALANEL and people know what that is instantly. That may not happen until a year or two from now but I think it can happen.

So now for a couple of announcements. For one, I have opened the door for you to join my site. Just follow the link to get more details. Also, and I’ve been saying this for a while, but vote on your favorite DGS features. So far, I’m going to cut news satire. There’s a couple of features I want to add but we’ll see.

My video series may pause for a week as I’m having some growing technical difficulties. I have enough episodes to get me through the month recorded so I still have some time but it’s gonna be a photo finish.

So thanks for the support as DALANEL takes in second half of the year by storm!

-DALANEL

Daily Good Stuff 110

Ah we made it to July. My favorite month. After a weekend of abbreviated DGS, I am back to full speed. Joke, video, images, quote, scripture, good news, and weird/funny news. Are you ready? Then let’s go!

A new pastor moved into town and went out one Saturday to visit his parishioners. All went well until he came to one house. It was obvious that someone was home, but no one came to the door even after he had knocked several times. Finally, he took out his card and wrote on the back: Revelation 3:20 and stuck it in the door. The next day, as he was counting the offering he found his card in the collection plate. Below his message was the notation Genesis 3:10.

Revelation 3:20 reads: “Behold I stand at the door and knock. If any man hear my voice, and opens the door, I will come in to him, and will dine with him, and he with me.” Genesis 3:10 reads: “And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked.”

Ha! I love Bible jokes. Alright here’s a video:

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Daily Good Stuff 109

Sunday! Last day of June. So let’s get this day started right.

Ol’ Fred had been a faithful Christian and was in the hospital, near death.

The family called their pastor to stand with them.

As the pastor stood next to the bed, Ol’ Fred’s condition appeared to deteriorate and he motioned frantically for something to write on. The pastor lovingly handed him a pen and a piece of paper, and Ol’ Fred used his last bit of energy to scribble a note, then he died. The pastor thought it best not to look at the note at that time, so he placed it in his jacket pocket. At the funeral, as he was finishing the message, he realized that he was wearing the same jacket that he was wearing when Ol’ Fred died. He said, “You know, Ol’ Fred handed me a note just before he died. I haven’t looked at it, but knowing Fred, I’m sure there’s a word of inspiration there for us all.” He opened the note, and read out loud, “You fool, you’re standing on my oxygen tube!”

How unfortunate! And a comic:

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