Weekly Funnies 29: Funny Animals

Yo, it’s ya boy Danny and I’m taking the funnies shift from Dante this week. Good thing too because his sense of humor…eh. I’m playin.

So what is it? A joke, image, video, news, and possibly quote? And this is animal themed. As you might have seen in my avi, I like animals. No, not sexual intercourse level, but we tight.

Let’s get to the funnies!

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Aw dude, wth? Oh, here’s a joke:

A frog telephones the Psychic Hotline and is told, “You are going to meet a beautiful young girl who will want to know everything about you.”

The frog says, “This is great! Will I meet her at a party, or what?”

“No,” says the psychic. “Next semester in her biology class.”

Now hold on, he won’t actually meet her, right? Won’t he be dead already? Or maybe they’re introduced to the frogs but it’s later in the semester when they actually cut the princes open. F it; Idk.

Here’s some funny animal fails. I can’t promise to animals were harmed in the making of this video.

Okay, the dog that pissed on the other one. The heck was that about!?

Alright, guys and gals. I’m out. Peace and keep laughing or something.

Dante’s Opinion and Share Your Story

Just a friendly reminder about two of my pages here at DALANEL.

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Dante’s Opinion is the page for you to submit questions you may have for me or the team here at DALANEL. On that particular Tuesday, we’ll have the answer ready for you. Yes, it’s our opinion; not really advice giving. And again, if you ask me, it’s Dante’s Opinion. Ask Nia? Nia’s Opinion. Daniel? Daniel’s Opinion. Dallas? Dallas’ Opinion.

One note about Dallas; her opinion piece ended up being a top liked post on the site. That’s the first time an opinion post made that list and it just so happens that’s the first post I didn’t do. This confirms two things at least. One, my opinion sucks! More importantly, this really helped with Dallas’ confidence. She shared plenty of concerns she had about doing the post but, I knew she could do it.

Next is Share Your Story. I want to hear from you. What good news have happened in your life? The page will tell you what we’re looking for as well as how you can submit your story.

These pages are designed to get you involved with the blog. It could be fun. So, go ahead and hit the pages: Dante’s Opinion. Share Your Story.

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Good News 57: Officer saves baby, Help for Atlanta, and more.

Since I’m doing this once a week thing, you can actually expect more than just 2-3 articles. I’m aiming for 4-5 now.

Our first one is how an officer saves a baby’s life:

He immediately opened the baby’s shirt and began rubbing his sternum, but the baby still wasn’t breathing. He quickly rolled the infant over and began administering back blows, pausing after a moment to see the baby was still unconscious and still not breathing. He rolled the baby over a second time and applied more back blows, which caused the baby to vomit and dislodged the obstruction in his airway. The baby began breathing again and opened his eyes.

He’s set to receive a medal for his actions. As for the baby, apparently, it was the result of a milk allergy.

Next, Atlanta and its surrounding areas are struggling with a snow storm. And so, this happened:

Good Samaritans across metro Atlanta took food to thousands of stranded motorists spending the night on ice-locked freeways, helped push cars up hills, offered rides and places to recharge cellphones, and even invited strangers into their homes for the night.

The link goes on to tell a few stories of helping others.

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Are you a bandwagon Christian?

Welp, here we freaking go again. I might hit a nerve. You could end up feeling some kind of way after I’m done. That’s assuming you end up reading this whole post.

I. You. We. Need to look into the mirror and ask ourselves this question: Am I a bandwagon Christian?

It’s nothing to be ashamed of, in a sense. I mean, it’s not like we’re jumping up and down with excitement every time we face a trial. Still, there are some people that really want all of the benefits and don’t want to work for anything.

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The Miracle Before My Driver’s Test

blog-quitb4miracleScared. Nervous. Worried.

Perhaps one of those words, or another that I can’t think of, is how I felt that day. It was March and I was a sexy teenager. After spending all winter learning how to drive, it was time to take the test.

I always feel cocky whenever I drive in harsh weather if only because I took my driver’s test in that kind of weather. Snow and ice doesn’t bother me that much. On the flip side, the whole time I was learning was during the winter and so I’m probably a more timid driver because I almost always drive as if there’s ice on the road.

Anyway, it’s March. Thursday.

You might have done some parking and other practices in an empty parking lot, right? Maybe it was very early or very late at night when there were no cars around.

That’s what I went through with my dad.

During my time behind the wheel, I realized that I hated driving. I knew going in it wasn’t Mario Kart. By the way, I will destroy in any Mario Kart. Let me know. I promise to make you cry. Anyway, I knew it was serious and that’s why, even to this day, I don’t really enjoy driving. I’m constantly scared of hitting somebody whether a car or a person.

The last thing I had to practice was parallel parking. Oh Lord. I got all other tricks of the trade down. I just couldn’t, for the love of God, get in between those shopping carts in one smooth motion.

Even that early Thursday morning, I was freaking out. “I can’t fail this test. I can’t”. Right. My mom tried to console me. “Oh, I didn’t pass my first time.” She said this a while ago. See, when I went to take my written test, I failed. And failed. And failed. I think it took me four or five times before I got it. My mom said she pulled it off easily.

We all have our strengths and weaknesses or some crappy morale lesson like that. I wasn’t hearing it.

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Wednesday Word: Accepting criticism

Criticism. Mainly, constructive criticism. How do we handle it? Check out the video:

That’s the key. Or, keys. For one, we need to be willing to accept being corrected. And we need to surround ourselves with people who are willing to do that correcting.

I’m one of those guys who can take and deal out criticism. I probably get that from my mom, who has a large reputation of not having a problem talking to people about themselves. And, what I’ve noticed over the years is that people turn to her for advice and “what should I do?” because they value her honesty.

As the verse said, it’s basically better to be around people who may not be a friend but will tell you what you need to hear vs someone close to you who tells you what you want to hear. If we’re keeping it real, that second part could imply that people close to you are willing to lie to you to risk not hurting your feelings. Is that what you would want in your best friend? Spouse?

That’s the only way we can grow. Pride in ourselves can turn us off to it. If we think we’re fine and don’t have to improve, we’re doomed. God already hates pride. We need to humble ourselves. We need to take criticism. Consider it. Like Blake said, check and see if it lines up with the Word of God and His standards.

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