funny news

Weekly News 7

I got some news for ya!

I’ll let you decide if this is weird or good news but doctors were able to grow another nose for a man…on his forehead:

After a Chinese man’s nose was irreparably damaged from infection, his doctors decided to “grow” a second nose on the man’s forehead to replace the original nose.

If you’re lazy and don’t want to hit the link, here’s a picture. I bet that’ll spark your interest:

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The medical field is making progress. My only issue is…well…look at him…he’s my age and I can’t imagine living like that.

For good news, we have a dog that saved a baby from crawling into the ocean. First of all, I’m glad the dog saved the kid. Second, the parents might want to keep an eye on him. Just my opinion.
For weird news, termites are so hard to get rid of because apparently, their poop helps resist poisons. Wait, I’m not done yet. So, scientists say the poop forms a “force field” that protects the little guys from harm. Well ain’t that story full of…

Daily Good Stuff 185

Beauty is only skin deep. If you go after someone just because she’s  beautiful but don’t have anything to talk about, it’s going to get boring fast.  You want to look beyond the surface and see if you can have fun or if you have  anything in common with this person. Amanda Peet

I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes: first for the Jew, then for the Gentile. Romans 1:16
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A captain in the foreign legion was transferred to a desert outpost. On his orientation tour he noticed a very old, seedy looking camel tied out back of the enlisted men’s barracks. He asked the sergeant leading the tour, “What’s the camel for?” The sergeant replied, “Well sir, it’s a long way from anywhere, and the men have natural sexual urges, so when they do, we have the camel.” The captain said, “Well, if it’s good for morale, then I guess it’s all right with me.”  After he had been at the fort for about 6 months, the captain could not stand it anymore, so he told his sergeant, “BRING IN THE CAMEL!!!” The Sarge shrugged his shoulders and led the camel into the captain’s quarters. The captain got a foot stool and proceeded to have vigorous sex with the camel. As he stepped, satisfied, down from the stool and was buttoning his pants he asked the sergeant, “Is that how the enlisted men do it?”

The sergeant replied, “Well sir, they usually just use it to ride into town.” 

For good news, we have a dog that saved a baby from crawling into the ocean. First of all, I’m glad the dog saved the kid. Second, the parents might want to keep an eye on him. Just my opinion.
For weird news, termites are so hard to get rid of because apparently, their poop helps resist poisons. Wait, I’m not done yet. So, scientists say the poop forms a “force field” that protects the little guys from harm. Well ain’t that story full of…
-DALANEL

Weekly News 6

Another round of good, weird, and funny news to check out! Are you ready? Let’s do this thing.

This isn’t weird news…even if it does sound weird. No, we’ll say this is good news. For two years now, this guy, on his birthday, stands out in the street giving out money. Yup. Giving it away. This year was $750.

Here’s some creepy news. If you hate clowns, turn back now. Apparently, there’s a clown stalking a town. Yes, a town. Where? Northampton, England is where. Trust me, I’m not clowning around.

In Good News, we have a man who decided to show love to those less fortunate. He quit his six figure salary job to do charity work.

Mark Wahlberg (yes, that Mark Wahlberg) has finally become a high school graduate at age 42. He wants kids to finish too:
His Mark Wahlberg Youth Foundation has partnered with other organizations to provide resources to young people who commit to finishing high school.
Good for him.

Daily Good Stuff 181

TGIF, y’all! I’ve been busy this week getting myself ready for the 76ers’ season. You’ll see a couple of posts about my thoughts on the season soon. For now, let’s finish the post.

Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself, do not go out  and look for a successful personality and duplicate it. Bruce Lee

For we are God’s workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. Ephesians 2:10
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Cool.

Daily Good Stuff 177

So, we made it to another DGS. Have you heard about my new blog feature: Dante and Basketball? If it becomes successful enough, it could end up being “Dante and Sports”. But, let’s start small, ya know? Anyway, on to the post.

thCAUATA8Y

A young woman was having a physical examination and  was embarrassed because of a weight problem. As she  removed her last bit of clothing, she blushed. “I’m so ashamed, Doctor,” she said, “I guess I let myself go.”

The physician was checking hers eyes and ears. “Don’t  feel ashamed, Miss. You don’t look that bad.”

“Do you really think so, Doctor?” she asked.

The doctor held a tongue depressor in front of her face  and said, “Of course. Now just open your mouth and  say moo.”

This isn’t weird news…even if it does sound weird. No, we’ll say this is good news. For two years now, this guy, on his birthday, stands out in the street giving out money. Yup. Giving it away. This year was $750.

Here’s some creepy news. If you hate clowns, turn back now. Apparently, there’s a clown stalking a town. Yes, a town. Where? Northampton, England is where. Trust me, I’m not clowning around.

And you thought I wouldn’t slip in a corny joke!

-DALANEL

Weekly News 5

We made it to the end of the week. Here’s some news from this week that I think you’d find interesting:

A man is being awarded by the mayor of a town. Why? Welp, all he did was help a poor defenseless 82-year old woman who had her purse stolen. Yup, that’s it.

I’ve debated about this being the weird news but I’m going for it. Apparently, the smaller a man’s balls, the more nurturing he will be as a father. I could go further but I won’t.

Jim Carrey was quoted earlier this year as hating his role in the movie “Kick-Ass 2″ and told the world to stay away from the movie. So now, he wrote a children’s book. Yup, and I actually think it’s a cool story. And I mean the summary and idea behind it. Not sure how well it’s written though. It’ll be available in a couple of weeks but learn about it here. It was self published. I know all about that.

There’s a man that got in trouble for DUI. Wait…not DUI…but I guess it’s RUI: Riding Under the Influence. Yes, a man got in trouble for riding a horse while drunk. No more horsing around for this guy (Sorry; I had to do it).

Here’s some good news. A man saves a woman and her young daughter trapped during a flash flood. The only thing I find odd about it is that he got it on film…
Here’s a lesson on why we should always wear a belt. This guy robs a church but then gets caught because as he was running away, his baggy pants fell down.
Good stuff
-DALANEL