jokes

Daily Good Stuff 18

Hey dudes and dudettes! It’s the weekend, my friends and while there’s changes going on in my world of writing, you can expect the same good stuff here. And, with less time committed to the blog, I can put more time into this one. So, let’s get going! We’ll go with a joke to kick things off:

The class assignment in composition was to write about something unusual that happened during the past week. Little Irving got up to read his. “Papa fell in the well last week – ” he began. “Good heavens,” shrieked Mrs. Kroop, the teacher. “Is he all right now?” “He must be,” said little Irving. “He stopped yelling for help yesterday.”

Oh well…that’s unfortunate. Here’s a video of a pretty neat prank:

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Daily Good Stuff 17

The month of March is coming to an end but that doesn’t mean my march of daily good stuff has to end. I have fun with words. Anyway, let’s start off with a video as we have returned to our regular format. It’s a spoof of a popular (and annoying song in my case). Let’s see if you recognize it; and then tell me which one is better:

Yes, I know. Pretty freaking awesome. Let’s get a joke in here:

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Daily Good Stuff 16

More jokes. Yay.

A bird was flying south for Winter, but he had left it too late and was frozen solid in a storm. He dropped down into a pasture of cows. The biggest, fattest cow was doing a crap there, and the bird landed in it. At first he was disgusted, until he realized the poo was thawing him out! He started crying out for joy as the ice melted. A cat that was nearby heard the cries, walked over, saw the bird and ate it.

There are three morals to this story:

1. Not everyone who gets you into crap is your enemy

2. Not everyone who gets you out of crap is your friend

3. If you are in crap, keep your mouth shut

Lovely and a life lesson too! Here’s something nice:

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Daily Good Stuff 13: A lot of Jokes

I wanted to switch things up a little bit. Today, I’m going to push jokes. I give you 4 jokes.

Two old drunks in a bar. The first one says, “Ya know, when I was 30 and got a hard-on, I couldn’t bend it with either of my hands. By the time I was 40, I could bend it about 10 degrees if I tried really hard. “By the time I was 50, I could bend it about 20 degrees, no problem. I’m gonna be 60 next week, and now I can almost bend it in half with just one hand” “So,” says the second drunk, “what’s your point?” “Well,” says the first, “I’m just wondering how much stronger I’m gonna get!”

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Daily Good Stuff 12

Here we go again! It’s Sunday; Palm Sunday to be exact for my line of religion. Got church this morning and then watch the Sixers tonight. Joy. Take a nap in between, yo. Let’s get it started with an “how to” video:

And image!

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Daily Good Stuff 11

Howdy! You already know what this is so let’s get to it. A joke for starters:

A woman arrived at a party. While scanning the guests, she spotted an attractive man standing alone. She approached him, smiled and said, “Hello. My name is Carmen.” “That’s a beautiful name,” he replied. “Is it a family name?” “No,” she replied. As a matter of fact I gave it to myself. It represents the things that I enjoy the most – cars and men. Therefore I chose “Carmen”. “What’s your name?” she asked. He answered “B.J. Titsengolf.”

Excellent!

Okay now for a quote: No one ever really dies as long as they took the time to leave us with fond memories.  ~Chris Sorensen

Now for a video that could make me look like a big jerk:

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